Topic of the discussion
Posted on 8/27/18 10:36 PM
Ive felt suicidal for years ive got emotional unstable personality disorder and PTSD and depression and i mobed over 6months ago for a new start and ive had no help grom my doctor (g)and i saw a nurse at a menatl health lace and he said PTSD isnt a mental health condition i was doing a poor me and i have to pull her finger out and gwt on with it and i dont have depression because i can laugh and am aware.and then i saw a psychology doctor and she said i had Emotional unstable personality disorder and ive heqrd nothing since and i feel im getting worse and my hole entire family have cut me off and out of their lives like i never existed.and my paranid thoughts and suicidal thoughts are getting worse and worse and im not sleeping am very tempted to turn back to beer to shut my head up.and im finding it harder not to take all the tablets in my house or slit my wrists.
Beginning of the discussion - 8/28/18Suicide tendencies getting stronger https://www.carenity.co.uk/forum/depression/living-with-behavioural-disorders-mental-illne/suicide-tendencies-getting-stronger-2534
Posted on 8/28/18 10:07 AM
@Woodsta1986 Hello woodsta1986,
I am so sorry that you're feeling this way but welldone on taking the brave step in reaching out to others, sometimes asking for help can be the hardest part.
Keep ringing the psychology doctor that diagnosed you and don't give up hope.
I would recommend that you call Samaritans to talk about how you feel, it is completely free: 116 123 Or you can email them at firstname.lastname@example.org
If you would like to talk to someone in person, then follow this link to find the closest branch to you.
Here is a link to a previous thread we had on here where posters were feeling similar to you, I hope you can get some comfort in that.
I really hope that you feel better soon and please don't do anything drastic, you can do this.
Posted on 9/2/18 7:11 PM
Hi Josephine thank you for relying to me sorry for my late reply im finding it very hard to function with normal things like getting out of bed taking pills etc.i still feel like taking all the tablets in the house but havent im trying to focus on helping my wife she has AS and she may have to have a operation or injections into her spine at some point.and i have thought of cutting myself again my head says it will help ot helped before it will help again.
Posted on 9/3/18 12:08 PM
Don't forget you are not alone, a lot of other members on Carentiy have felt similarly to you, have you browsed through our other discussions on this page?
sometimes the hardest thing can be asking for help, but to repeat my previous advice, the Samaritans are a wonderful and supportive resource which you should defnitely explore.
Do any other members have any advice or tips or encouragement?
Posted on 9/3/18 2:29 PM
Hi Josephine thank ypu for relying to me i havent looked at many of thr discussions im not very good with modern technology and find it really hard.i almoat called the Samaritans like you surgested and my head said not to because they might think i was doing a poor me (ive tried several times talking to my fam and they said stop doing a poor and trying to get attention) and then i got really anxious and went back to cutting myself to try and releave some tension and anxiety.
Posted on 9/3/18 2:30 PM
Ive been cutting myself on and off for years
Posted on 9/4/18 9:40 AM
@Woodsta1986 Hello Woodsta,
I can guarantee you that no one on the other end of Samaritans would ever think that you are putting on a "poor me" act, they are professionals that are there to help you. If you feel you can't pick up the phone, you could e-mail them with the post you put up here?
Here is a link to one of our threads with users discussing their depression: link
I hope this helps and you feel better soon.
Posted on 9/4/18 3:08 PM
Hi Josephine thank you for replying to me ive now emailed Samaritans i couldn't build up enough confidence to ring or txt them.ive read a bit of the thread you kindly attached a link for me.
Posted on 9/5/18 1:58 PM
@Woodsta1986 That's great that you have taken some steps, you should definitely be proud of yourself as sometimes asking for help can be the hardest part.
do any other members have any advice to give?
Posted on 9/26/18 2:40 PM
Hi Josephine thank you for relying to me
I went to see psychiatrist on 25th September 18 at 13:00pm and she said that they aren't going to give any more therapy because of waiting list and not enough resorses and they're going to wean me off amitriptyline. They said ill see doc in 8weeks. They're moving me to another medication- mirtapazine. No antipsychotic medication atm. Emotional unstable personality disorder is the definite diagnosis along with bad depression and severe PTSD. And i have huge anger/violent out bursts and i have impulsive behaviours i have zero confidence and have to push myself do do things that i like and i have zero self-esteem and violent tendencies and believe that im useless and do nothing right and hate myslef.
(Only seen psychrist twice since movng 7 months ago)
Im now convinced that im gunna get no help ever again from this usless NHS and my GP doesn't seem to care at all.this has now set me right back and still cutting.and i have isolated myself.from people and only go out if i have to and thats really hard for me.
Im unable to sleep, and have restless sleep as well
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