“STOP, get some rest”: Goldenpalace’s story of recovery after a psychotic episode

Life under pressure before the episode

Looking back, she describes a particularly stressful daily routine, shaped by work, family responsibilities and a lack of sleep.

She had never heard of this type of episode, so she did not recognise what was happening to her.

In 2023, she experienced an acute psychotic episode lasting around a month and a half. During this time, she had several types of hallucinations involving sounds, sights, bodily sensations and tastes.

But while they were happening, she did not understand that they were hallucinations.

“I didn’t realise I was experiencing delusions,” she explains.

Her loved ones were the first to notice that something had changed. Her behaviour became different, she began withdrawing from others and she experienced outbursts of anger.

“I was overwhelmed by so many voices”

Among the most striking aspects of her episode, Goldenpalace remembers the many voices she heard in her head.

“I was overwhelmed by so many voices in my head, sarcastic, commanding and threatening.”

These voices gradually took over more and more of her daily life. Eventually, she began to believe what they were telling her.

At one particularly frightening moment, she became convinced that she was having a heart attack and might die. She physically felt sensations that she interpreted as the symptoms of a heart attack.

She also describes visual hallucinations: figures, shapes and distortions in the faces of the people she looked at.

In those moments, everything she perceived felt completely real.

“I was under the influence of those voices. I came to believe what they were telling me.”

“I wasn’t ill”: accepting treatment

At first, Goldenpalace refused the treatment she was offered. In her mind, she was not ill, so there was no reason to take medication.

However, she eventually saw a psychiatrist. After several appointments, the psychiatrist explained that treatment was needed to help her recover and stop the hallucinations.

She was prescribed an antipsychotic medication, risperidone, initially at a dose of 1 mg.

She no longer remembers exactly how long it took, but she gradually noticed that the voices disappeared.

Alongside medication, something else helped her: understanding what was happening.

“What helped me keep going was my doctor telling me that what I was experiencing was a psychotic episode.”

After the episode came fear

For Goldenpalace, the hardest part did not end when the hallucinations stopped.

It was only after she understood what she had been through that the fear truly set in.

The months that followed brought depression, severe anxiety and increasingly intense suicidal thoughts.

She also lived with a persistent fear of experiencing another psychotic episode.

Conversations with her psychiatrist played an important part in her recovery. Being able to ask questions, understand her condition and talk about her worries gradually helped her regain confidence.

“Over time, I got better. It took me nine months to recover.”

Understanding her limits

Looking back three years later, Goldenpalace sees that period differently.

She feels that the episode taught her something essential: she could not carry everything on her own.

“This episode made me realise that I clearly wasn’t Wonder Woman.”

She says her doctor attributed the episode to a combination of overwork, stress and a lack of sleep. She also explains that she had never used recreational drugs.

Since then, she has tried to take better care of herself and respect her limits.

The message she wishes she could give her former self, before the episode, is simple:

“STOP. GET SOME REST.”

Three years later: “I’ve got my life back on track”

Today, Goldenpalace feels she has come a long way.

Her medication has gradually been reduced under her doctor’s supervision. She explains that she now takes only a low dose of risperidone, 0.5 mg a day. According to her, her doctor has said she can stop taking it, but she prefers to continue with this small dose because it reassures her.

Medication remains an important part of her story. She highlights the side effects she experienced and the importance of telling her doctor about them so that her care could be adjusted.

In particular, she mentions weight gain, which she attributes to the antipsychotic medication. She has since joined a gym and is also trying to make changes to her diet.

Above all, she has returned to a life in which she feels more like herself.

“I’ve got my life back on track. I feel comfortable in my own skin.”

Nevertheless, she remains aware that psychological recovery can take time.

“The brain needs time to recover.”

A message for anyone going through a psychotic episode

For someone who has recently experienced a psychotic episode and fears they will never recover, Goldenpalace wants to offer hope.

She does not downplay how difficult the experience can be, or how challenging the following months may feel. She also acknowledges that treatment side effects can be hard to cope with.

Her advice is to avoid facing those worries alone and to discuss side effects with a doctor.

“You really need to tell your doctor everything so they can adjust your treatment.”

She also stresses that any changes to medication should be made with professional support. In her case, the antipsychotic dose was reduced gradually under medical supervision.

Her experience has taught her that recovery is not always quick, but that it is possible to find peace and stability again.

What about loved ones?

Her experience also highlights the importance of noticing unusual changes in a loved one’s behaviour.

Withdrawal, outbursts of anger and significant changes in daily habits were among the signs that alerted her family.

During the episode, Goldenpalace says she lost contact with reality and experienced several types of hallucinations. She therefore emphasises the role loved ones can play in encouraging someone to seek care.

She also advises being attentive to possible treatment side effects and discussing them with the doctor.

“You can speak with the doctor looking after your loved one. It’s always reassuring to hear the doctor’s perspective.”

“I know how far I’ve come”

Three years after her psychotic episode, Goldenpalace does not claim to have completely forgotten what happened.

The fear of another episode is still there.

But it no longer defines her life.

Her experience has taught her to listen more closely to her body, accept her limits and stop trying to manage everything alone.

Having once thought she could be “Wonder Woman”, she discovered that, like everyone else, she needed rest and support.

Her story is also about gradually finding herself again. After hallucinations, fear, anxiety and depression, she regained her sense of stability and resumed her life.

And if she had to sum up what she wishes she had known before it all began, her message would be simple:

“STOP, get some rest.”

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