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  • My best friend my Mum is dying
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Living with cancer

My best friend my Mum is dying

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avatar masoka

masoka

06/08/2018 at 00:47

avatar masoka

masoka

Last activity on 21/10/2020 at 00:44

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3 comments posted | 3 in the Living with cancer group


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18 months ago my darling Mum went to the doctor with a bad cough that had gone on for 12 weeks. They diagnosed her with reflux after saying there was a coarse line on her lung and doing tests. My Mum has never smoked. 5 months ago she went to the doctor. She had lost 4 stone and had severe back ache. She was diagnosed with osteoporosis and arthritis in her spine. Again they misdiagnosed her and sent her to a physio. She went to a and e and was told her x-ray was fine so went on holiday for a week and came bk to phone calls saying she had a fracture in her spine. The physio sent my mum for a ct scan and when they got the results they told us it was cancer. She had a bronchostomy and it showed she has stage 4 lung cancer with metastasis to the lymph nodes the liver and the adrenal gland and told us we are looking at months rather than years. They did an Mri scan a week later and concluded the cancer has spread to her spine and colapsed her spine. 6 days later she was rushed to hospital with suspected sepsis after being told she had a pulled muscle. The doctor who had missdiagnosed reflux did another ct scan which he said showed a possible blood clot on the lung and said that my mum would need another ct scan the next day so put a cannula in her arm with an enhancer to show up the c.f. scan better. In doing this wrong he split her vein and caused internal bleeding. He was taken off our case. The consultant had a look at the ct scan and concluded it was cracked ribs not a blood clot on the lung and sent her home the next day.no ct scan was needed and my mum didn't need the cannula that was put in wrongly. Mum is hm now but there just seems to be mistake after mistake which is ultimately going to take my best friend away from me. I get married in less than 3 weeks and I am just devastated and we have 2 children under 4 just so lost

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avatar Barley1964

Barley1964

06/08/2018 at 08:57

avatar Barley1964

Barley1964

Last activity on 06/08/2018 at 18:09

Joined in 2018


2 comments posted | 1 in the Living with cancer group


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OMG how horrible for you that's a disgrace so sorry to here this I no I've only just joined this site so proberry to late to say sorry but hope your OK and your family xx


My best friend my Mum is dying https://www.carenity.co.uk/forum/other-discussions/living-with-cancer/my-best-friend-my-mum-is-dying-2512 2018-08-06 08:57:18

avatar masoka

masoka

06/08/2018 at 10:30

avatar masoka

masoka

Last activity on 21/10/2020 at 00:44

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3 comments posted | 3 in the Living with cancer group


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I only posted last night and ty for your reaponse


My best friend my Mum is dying https://www.carenity.co.uk/forum/other-discussions/living-with-cancer/my-best-friend-my-mum-is-dying-2512 2018-08-06 10:30:49

avatar Margaret1

Margaret1

06/08/2018 at 12:54

Good advisor

avatar Margaret1

Margaret1

Last activity on 06/05/2025 at 20:13

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89 comments posted | 16 in the Living with cancer group

1 of their responses was helpful to members


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Dreadful for the terrible time your family are going through. You need to timetable the list of things that happened in your mums case and put in a formal complaint to the GP or hospital. Also is it possible to make an appointment to see the consultant and find out the exact situation and any possible various treatments? Mums are precious and mean so much to us and none of the ideas above might help your mum - or it just might- but it may help you make sense of things a bit more. Thought and prayers are with you  


My best friend my Mum is dying https://www.carenity.co.uk/forum/other-discussions/living-with-cancer/my-best-friend-my-mum-is-dying-2512 2018-08-06 12:54:54

avatar masoka

masoka

09/08/2018 at 00:53

avatar masoka

masoka

Last activity on 21/10/2020 at 00:44

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thank you for your kind reply but at the moment mum wants us to just concentrate on spending time with her but ty


My best friend my Mum is dying https://www.carenity.co.uk/forum/other-discussions/living-with-cancer/my-best-friend-my-mum-is-dying-2512 2018-08-09 00:53:39

avatar robjmckinney

robjmckinney

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20/08/2018 at 16:30

Good advisor

avatar robjmckinney

robjmckinney

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Last activity on 25/06/2025 at 19:15

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627 comments posted | 41 in the Living with cancer group

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Hi Masoka,

The GPs did the same with my brother, he had back pain and just threw painkillers at him for years. By the time they got round to thinking it was cancer, only after changing GP it was already to late. He spent the next year or so going through agonising treatment until they said they could no longer treat him. He died within a month from a technically treatable cancer where people live for 30 years or more with it. Sadly the high death rate from cancer  in Britain is almost totally down to GP failures to refer patients onto hospital. That is despite tests are relatively cheap to do the GPs simply won't do them. That is why you can now contact the cancer specialists directly to have the tests done today, it was announced a few months ago. 

My Dad died last year from cancer where I choose to have him with me for the last few years of his life. I had to fight tooth and nail for the NHS to operate on him to remove the cancers to give him more time. But at 93 they finally said they would no longer operate. Death is never easy but with cancer it is a release from pain and suffering. When you monitor her morphine make sure they give her enough. Because of the scare stories over overdosing patients the nurses tend to be to stingy leaving the patient in great pain, insist on the max.

I am a cancer survivor but the only one so far in my family, or should the correct term be in remission.

See the signature

robjmckinney


My best friend my Mum is dying https://www.carenity.co.uk/forum/other-discussions/living-with-cancer/my-best-friend-my-mum-is-dying-2512 2018-08-20 16:30:33

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