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Can loneliness be inherited?
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sodowninsurrey
Good advisor
Passed down genetically? I dont think so, but I think a lonely parent is isolated and so his kids are too.
sad_faery
This is an interesting story. My parents were both very social people, but I always felt misunderstood.
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Michael_B
Community managerGood advisor
Do you suffer from feelings of loneliness or isolation? Did your parents or other close relatives deal with the same thing? Some people wonder if loneliness can be passed on from parent to child. Take a look at this article and leave us a comment about your experiences.
'Did I inherit loneliness from my mum?'
By Nichola Carroll
BBC News
Do we inherit loneliness from our parents in the same way we inherit our hair and eye colour? Two women explain how loneliness has played a part in their lives - and how it relates to their parents and children.
"Loneliness for me is constant. No matter where I am, it just doesn't go away. It's almost like you can feel it in your bones, this deep feeling of wanting to fit in and wanting to be around people you know and love, but you can't.
"I do think I have inherited it. It's kind of been passed on to me."
Angel Kissi and her mum Hayley, both struggle with anxiety, depression and loneliness. For her mum, the latter was sparked by severe post-natal depression. For Angel, it started when she was a child.
"My family stood out in Peterborough. Everyone knew who we were because we looked different. I'm really tall and mixed race and I stood out," says the 20-year-old. "When I went to university, things were good but I still felt like I didn't fit in. I thought moving to London would change that and it didn't.
"I still felt like I was quiet and awkward. I really struggled to connect with people and make friends straight away. Everyone was going out for drinks after class and I was never invited. I felt like I was doing something wrong.
"Eventually I stopped going to my lectures. I would get up, get ready to go and then go back to bed. I would avoid going to shared areas of my flat, I shut myself away and isolated myself. I went into the loneliness and let it take over."
Unable to cope, Angel left university before the first year was over. Although she felt a strong desire to go home and be close to her mum, she rented a room close-by.
"It's good we don't live together because we would be bringing each other up and down all the time. She has definitely helped me with some aspects [of my mental health] but other times I didn't want to speak to her because I didn't want to make her worse.
"If she was different, then maybe I'd be different. I don't blame her at all, she didn't choose to be like this, it's not her fault. It's probably something that I have got from her. Personality traits or attitudes that I've learnt from her without meaning to."
Read the rest of the article on the BBC website