I can't take this much longer.
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I can't handle life anymore. I'm tired, I hurt all over, life isn't for me.
No one cares about me. Not even my own family. My mum would rather have her drink than have a kid like me. I just don't want to be here anymore. I'm a loser. I started self-harming again, no one even notices i'm unhappy and depressed. I cry all day and all night. I self-harm every day, I think about suicide everyday, I can't even have a good birthday. My mum can't afford it and I know that isn't a big deal for some people, but all my birthdays have been rubbish and I just want one good birthday, I keep telling people that if my life gets any worse, I will have no choice but to end it. I think after this birthday, that's going to have to be my choice.
I can't get help, my doctor won't help, she sends me to these people who have no idea about what they are talking about, they diagnosed me of having BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) then when I went back a week later, they said I was just having "growing pains" I don't know what to do anymore, no one wants to help.
Like I said, I am too tired to carry on with this life. Someone help???
Aww trust me i get the tiredness i wake up tired, dont matter how much sleep i get i am always tired. Never feel your alone though many people are feeling the same.
Well we care about you! :)
Have you thought about joining a different docs hun?
Also you get to the point when you think your going to do something stupid ring samantians i have rang them once before they were excellent !
Dont give up! :)
Message me privately if its any easier for you! Look after yourself, I have a few friends who self harm so i know how difficult it can be. BUt 100 per cent your not alone!
Take care from
Also things to try other then harm, jsut distraction so for me its music :)
Other people its art etc Anything you enjoy doing hun :)
Try stabbing a pillow, or buy a donkey thing with candy in and hit it and then eat the sweets ;)
Good evening Ask-Asylum; It was very sad reading your post. I urge you to go and get help asap if you are feeling truly like you want to take your own life. Depression really does play evil mind games.
I understand how hard it is when you are feeling so low and dragged down by everything that you can't see any way out of the pain, despair, self loathing and even being extra sensitive. You perceive other people as not caring about you. I don't know you but from reading your post you do want help; there is only you who can do that. Please be patient though; getting to a better place will take time. Don't be too quick to dismiss what help your GP is arranging for you , even if it isn't what you want to hear. Once you accept what is being said then you will start to improve.
There is light at the end of the tunnel; believe me. I never ever thought that I would be happy or even laugh due to my mental state. I am now in such a good place although it didn't happen over night.
I am sure that you are loved but due to your low moods you are not recognizing this . We hurt those closest to us. Take time out to channel your frustrations/anger .
Do things that you enjoy; take time to totally relax.
It isn't going to be easy but you can do it. Little by little, day by day.
Expect 2 steps forward, 3 steps back . Don't be hard on yourself.
Continue to communicate; this group is ideal for letting your inner most thoughts without being judged out .We are all here to help each other get to a better place.
Big hugs xx
Asking Asylum, I am very worried that you often think of taking your life. Could you see someone else at the surgery you go to? Or as Haze24 says, change your Doctors or call the Samaritans. Are you at school? Your Form Tutor, or Head of Year could refer you to the SEN team at your school - no-one need know, but there would be someone to speak to and confide in without being judged.
I think that once you have someone to speak to regularly, whoever it is - things won't seem so dreadful.
Please let us know how you get on honey
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Good evening Asking Asylum,
I get what you mean I come from a large family and am the oldest, growing up i was always taking care of my brothers and sisters while my mam worked and my dad was in the pub. I thought nobody cared about me and i started cutting, but after a while i spoke to a friend and he made me see that i was in a bad place but by talking to people who know how i was feeling and that could suggest places i could get help like the samaritans. After a while i was feeling better, and with help from my gp and a counsellor i straighted to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I won`t say it was easy or is easy as i have fallen into that dark place a few times and felt alone but by talking with my gp and my friends they helped me realise it was not as bad as i thought.
If you want to talk you can message me.
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I feel you. I used to have depression for 2 years and I was struggling to find a single thing to be happy about. I never believed in online therapy, but I decided to give it a try. I contacted a therapist whos name was Nedev i believe, she was working on plusguidance.com.We had 4 sessions and she really did help me out a lot.
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